Pusing, Crying, Starving Repeat!

 Your Sadness comes in episodes bil, yes 

Welcome 2023 club alias 2023 untuk yang ke-24. Akhirnya mulai sejak itu langit senja tak lagi senja, karena pulang keluar dari kehidupan nyatanya uda gelap gulita. I don't think so much, It's like better or not. There's something wrong about working our this particular kind of temperature. Wanting come back home it does'nt better than your struggle. Sabr, sabr bil. Refleksi hidup bisa di dapat dari mana saja 

Sebuah perubahan kehidupan yang gue pun nggak tau kenapa bisa begini, kenapa secepat itu, salah satu kesedihan gue adalah semakin kesini semakin gue nggak bisa mendapatkan insight, Gue sedih semakin jarang gue membaca, kalo dibandingkan dulu, 

Ya... paling enggak setahun yang lalu gue masih sempet baca Quora and then sekarang there's no time, semakin di buru-buru. Semakin sedikit waktu. Semakin hilang ruang berpikir

Esensi bekerja bekerja bekerja yang nyampe ke gue membuat pertanyaan besar, kenapa manusia harus bekerja? Terus kalo lo ga kerja hidup lo bakal resah, disisi lain emang sih nggak semuanya bisa lo dapetin dengan uang tapi nggak menampik kemungkinan dan kenyataan tanpa adanya uang lo bisa having a slighty better life di umur lo yang mau mencapai seper-empat abad ini. Kecuali kalo lo bener-bener punya keluarga yang bisa full and totally support diri lo dari mulai skala materi, mentally sampe all those a little things that you've need for forever in your life. But in other reality you're must standing by yourself alias berdiri diatas kaki lo sendiri. So' honestly rutinitas  bekerja bagi gue adalah sebuah Powefull demons of the deep harm my enemies as I sleep aja gue bisa sambil mikirin platfrom DCIS yang sekarang gue lagi kerjaiin. Krezii lyfe who I am. There's stories let the flow bil

Karena dari dulu tulisan di blog ini gue buat Jujur dari diri dan hati gue yang paling terdalam. Mungkin kalo di tanya keinginan gue sekarang apa? Gue akan jawab kalo keinginan buat diri gue adalah cukup nggak ngapa-ngapain dan nggak mikirin apapun. Sama satu lagi,

Jika mungkin gue diberikan cukup waktu dan kesempatan gue pengen berkelana jalan jauh sendirian muter-muter Jakarta Pusat ngelihatin gedung tinggi dan ke-riuhan orang-orang yang banyak disebut Jakarta never sleep. Meninggalkan Whatsapp, Email dan evenmore itu agenda agenda meeting, KPI Index likely more sleep fall apart and then I stay alone cooking my favorite food, listening my random playlist and tell them your originally script made from yours, picking up from your freedom roar.  Immortal Mellow banget tulisan ini, huhuhu

Throwback-

Turn sick in 2021, get GERD diagnosed, lose my cuteness kitten, downfall because my brother failed kedinasan exams, broken-hearted his losing and showing with another one, and have a problematic work environment, again losing your best friend, you have reached the finished get your new job but ya losing your postion because the companies lebih memilih yang seiman dengan mereka. Are you get racism bil? Yes exactly, the next level is frustration with parent debt,  all day long prayer for mother who is gravely ill likely bleeding my heart so deep. So why can I stay? I can't image how should I get through this year.  Let me go, 

Opened my first in 2023 hello resign, many people say like sometimes the hardest part is letting go for a start over. I am emotionally drained for people say if you're a kind human salsabila

"kowe iki wong apik annisa"

All a long way to go I recognize my brain you've heard bil is a little support can make me feel most alive. Sampe akhirnya gue nangis ketika denger tarkhim penanada jam mau memasuki waktu sholat isya di tanggal 24 Januari 2023, dan posisi gue baru pulang dari kerja, very deep, so likely very very deep, Stay a while exhausting, crying and starving with a lonelinees

adding cinnamon rolls for lately birth days cookie

Semoga kita dikuatkan,

Semoga Sabar kita ditambah, 

The first let's say Alhamdullilah, 

It was exhausting, I trust myself it was only for a couple of times. Indeed Allah it will be fine Bil. Salsabila Happy 2023 for your 24. Spin up!! Everything will be okay. At the end of the day bil, you are only human if you wanna cry let it cry, starving today not for tomorrow not for the next, writing in this putting it here